Alelou wrote:I think T'Pol's relationship with Trip could be seen as self-sabotage, more than her attempts to sabotage it are. In fact I think her attempts to sabotage it are all about T'Pol realizing she's Vulcan and this is just nuts.
I agree. I think, just plugging in more gaps for myself, that T'Pol is not only one of the more emotional ones, but a hopelessly curious individual. In the future, we hear Spock say "fascinating" all the time, but in T'Pol's time, curiousity for its own sake and probably considered a few steps above worthless. Why are you curious? Um, I just am.
That's not good enough; she was required to have a reason. Just as her society didn't provide her enough outlet for her curiosity and desire to experience more, the adultered and fragmented techniques of self-control didn't work for her. Suppressing emotions by ignoring and denying them probably works for a lot of Vulcans, but we see throughout the first three seasons that denying them doesn't work for T'Pol.
She keeps slipping. Then, after a while, you can see she starts to give up to a certain extent, allowing herself to indulge in emotional experiences such as melding, drugs, sexual behavior, despite knowing it was a downward spiral. From Trip's perspective, she was jerking him around. She would demonstrate interest in him, respond to his overtures, and then shut down, rinse and repeat. Yeah, she cared for him, she was attracted to him but she believed she wasn't supposed to be feeling those things, let alone acting on them. It became a constant cycle of slipping and scrabbling for self-restraint.
Then along comes the Kir'Shara, which probably revealed that there were multiple techniques for mastering one's emotions. There are extreme methods in which emotions are excised completely and, at the opposite end, is acknowledgment and restraint. It's noteworthy that after she starts reading into Surak's direct teachings, we see her really get a grip and simmer down. What's even more interesting is that, even though she's become less overtly emotional, she's become more overtly demonstrative in a very deliberate, though restrained, fashion. Which, unfortunately, Trip kept shooting down.
He was too busy sulking to notice that she had stopped flailing (not that he didn't have legitimate reason to be frustrated with her insecure, confused behavior). All he seemed to notice was that she had quit being so emotionally expressive and when a Human being does that, evinces little or no reaction, it usually means they hate you. It was ironic that he perceived her increased stability as a rejection. She had finally cottoned on that it was safe and normal to feel because "control" meant using logic to dictate your outward behavior, rather than denying emotion might be valid. When it looked like he no longer reciprocated, she backed off. It was illogical to pursue a person who didn't want her, no matter how she felt about it.
I think Season 5: The Reverse Pursuit, Serious Vulcan Style would have been fabo.