Postby Kotik » Thu Nov 11, 2010 3:18 pm
THE CHIEF ENGINEER TAKES A BATH
Just had a funny little idea. It's too short for an archive story, so I'll post it here. Takes place somewhere between "Bound" and "Demons". The trick-candle idea is from Zane Gray's "Differences" series.
This was getting out of hand. Shaking his head in disbelief, Captain Archer roamed the ship in search of his 'rogue' First Officer. After her first successful joke in sickbay in the aftermath of the Orion's pheromone attack, he had encouraged her to explore human humour, especially since nobody had seen the ship's chief engineer so relaxed and contend in a long time. It didn't take a warp scientist to see that she was the reason for Trip finding back to his old humorous self.
Captain Archer sighed. He should have known that she would take it way too serious. When he had told her to 'fraternize a little', she ended up romancing the Chief Engineer. Nobody spoke about it, but everyone knew it. This time however the result of his misjudgement came much quicker to the surface.
It all started 3 days ago, when T'Pol had asked Hoshi about the intricacies of 'practical jokes'...
*******
"Trip?" Captain Archer asked after the staff meeting was finished. "Are you going to stay in here?"
"Well Cap'n, I'd go if I could..." He stood up and his chair stayed where it was - on his backside. Hysterical laughter filled the room, except for T'Pol. She let her brows do the giggling.
Suddenly the chair fell off the Chief Engineers butt and the next round of laughter left the man indignated and flummoxed again - until he caught a glimpse of T'Pol trying to inconspicuously slip a small device into her pocket. His eyes went wide as he realized, who had played the prank on him.
Payback's a bitch, Darlin'...
*******
"T'Pol, how long do I have to wait for an answer? It's not really like you to get sloppy," the Captain remarked, when his question wasn't answered with the usual Vulcan efficiency. Turning around he saw T'Pol staring on her PADD in what passed on Vulcan for confusion, poking away at it.
"I might answer your question, after I determined, to which language Commander Tucker has changed my interface configuration. I believe it would expedite my progress to enlist Ensign Sato's services."
She raised her eyebrows in an attempt not to show her uneasiness.
As human tradition requires non-lethal retaliation, I shall plan my next course of action...
*******
Carrying out her plan with Vulcan efficiency, she had glued Commander Tucker's toolbox shut, before uploading what Ensign Sato called 'a raunchy tale' to the PADD, which contained his daily report for the Captain. Captain Archer had never turned such a shade of purple before over one of his Chief's reports.
In retaliation, she had found all her meditation candles exchanged for trick ones, which couldn't be extinguished. In the end she had to carry her candle to the nearest airlock - under the very amused observation of passing crew members - and had to depressurize it to extinguish her candle.
*******
"T'Pol?" Captain Archer called out as he saw her coming out of cargo bay two with a very elevated eyebrow.
"Captain?"
"I want to see you and Trip for dinner in the Captain's mess at 1900. I think we need to talk about those little pranks you keep playing on each other."
"We will be there, Captain."
He couldn't help the grin. She didn't even notice that she had started to refer to herself and Trip as 'we' and that she spoke for him as if it was the most normal thing in the world.
"Were is he anyway. Weren't you assigned to help him in engineering?"
"Commander Tucker is taking a bath."
"He's what? What did you do this time? Empty a bucket of oil over his head?" Her answer was another elevated eyebrow.
Ready to give up on it, he turned to leave, before it dawned on him...
"T'Pol, the only bath we have aboard is the Tellarite's mud bath that's still in... cargo bay two."
"I know," she delivered deadpan and walked away.
Shaking his head, he turned to inspect the warzone, when the door opened and he came face-to-face with a very messed-up Chief Engineer.
He couldn't fight the guffaw...
.
