Those Odd Vulcan Names

Genre: spoof/humor

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Star Trek names, and related intellectual property.

Summary: I've noticed that Vulcans in literature and on TV tend to have strong and forceful names: Tuvok, Koss, Soval, T'Pring. Surely, there must be some Vulcans with names that humans would find amusing?

Note: There will be NO sequel.

Ambassador Poop stood before the window of his office in the Vulcan Compound, watching the sun set over the Pacific. Earth was not Vulcan, but it had its fascinations, none more so than this ocean. In constant, restless motion, it was not unlike the humans who lived here.

He turned away from the window, and placed the last of his personal items into his travel bag. The new ambassador would be here shortly, and Poop did not desire to linger. The three months of his ambassadorship was a period he was ready to put behind him.

He had sensed a problem from the beginning; the hidden smiles, the suppressed laughter, there was clearly something wrong. It had taken a sympathetic human to point out the source of the problem: his name. It had effectively ended his tenure as Ambassador to Earth, but there would be other postings. He had, after all, followed the established protocols to the letter. No one could deny that.

His aide escorted the new Ambassador into his office, who then raised his hand in greeting, "Live long and prosper, Poop."

Poop returned the gesture, "Live long and prosper, Crap. May your tenure as Ambassador be fruitful and satisfying."

End